Friday, November 29, 2019

Echo land ballet

and how to measure the distance between echoes when the canyon dissolves...



what syllables are the rocks
and bones
and which vowels the flesh
of this song
where moonlight floats
across the garden
where shadows bathe
and echos bloom
in the depths of midnight
where all is lost
even the looking
fades
into the dried roses
last petals fallen
long ago
carpet the forgotten path
memories trail across autumn skies
ignite the dream
with moonlight
falling
through
threads of empty silken light
tattered prayer flags
eaten by time
as she slipped into the mirror
and found no front or back
or middle ground on which to stand

simply this dancing
of wind
in wind
an echoland ballet
with no dancers
or audience
or stage 
no ticket required
no hand or heart
to hold
the wind



last golden leaves
caught in stalks of summer's flowers
there is no artist 
other than these eyes
that no one wears
that cannot be found
a looker seems to arise in the looking
for an observer
but there is no one to step outside a rainbow
or into the shadow of moon
echoes fill the canyon
and dissolve into their own silence
as the walls 
melt
into the shoreless ocean
they never left




in the cradle of canyon
pale moon hangs on the door of dawn
last stars fade into pinks and oranges
woven with tattered wind plough-ed clouds

last leaves falling now
words rush through the window of my heart
pouring mouthfuls of sky
in
to 
sky




the heart is a skylight
between sky
and sky
pierced from the sides
the middle explodes
into shattered diamonds
reflecting the colors of everyone's eyes 
echoing the song of everyone's
deepest
longing
and 
fear
to erase their imaginary lines
and melt into liquid love



you may wall yourself off with books
but the beast you fear has claws that will tear you
apart
rip out your heart
and teeth that will eat it
the thing you fear and long for has feathers that will caress you
and fold you into sunlight
tears that will melt your heart
and an unquenchable fire that will boil your blood
into a froth of unspeakable magnificence
a madness that has been hidden
so deeply
you cannot imagine 
its ferocity
your wildness dances just beyond your grasp

but you know 
how hard it is 
to hold this love
for all and everything
this sorrow that sings your name
this joy that floats through waves of despair
there is war
and peace
everywhere
no where is no where to live

love ignites itself
surely it is always alive
burning through shine
and
shadow
no one wears this naked love
there is no skin thick enough
that will not be pierced
if not now...
perhaps on your deathbed
it will consume you

you cannot look for it
or invite it in
as there is no separation
between you
and love




No longer looking for happiness
No longer afraid of sadness
There is no one separate to feel this or that
All emotion merges into a sublime love



pale flower of moon
petals falling
sweeps over the garden
the scent of yesterday's rain
gathered in the fingers of naked trees

memories are dreams
that no one dreams
that dream us
plant us in a garden of love
where suns and moons slide across the sky
where we bathe in starlight
and long for love
our tears water our roots
and cleanse our leaves
we are the flower of love itself

such beauty cannot see itself
we exist only as this tender dance
I bloom only in your eyes

petals
exploding
and
wilting
leaves
falling
falling 
naked we love
and
die




wandering through the desert of broken shadows
moonlight poured through my footsteps
this shimmering mirage
has no entrance
or exit
ballet of light in light
pirouette without beginning or end
suspended as this edgeless sea of dreams...
no desert
no light
no echo
no mirage
no one wanders
sky swallowed in love





How can you ever leave the garden of love? Every step is
Flowers 
Blooming


Thought is not true or false 
True and false are thought


softly 
softly
layers and
layers
of
transparent luminescence 
slip 
through echoes of yesterdays moon

memory soars on arpeggio-ed wings
paints the sky

colors
sparkle and
bloom
in the mind stream
where you float
between the banks
of this and
that

you can hear the reflection
of the shoreless ocean
with every breath
it is inside
it is outside
it is sideless
there is no middle
no direction
the banks slip into the wetness
as you dissolve
into the ocean of love

it pours through its own soundless echo
flows through its own fathomless depths 
reverberates endlessly into its own reflection
sees its beauty
and weeps
through the prism of mind


slowly 
slowly
outdoor light erases the mirror
of window
images inside and outside merge
through the lens of imaginary separation
there appears to be a dance
between you and me
where hands
touch
where hearts
blossom and soar
into a pirouette of unfathomable wonder

where love
appears
is a fairytale world
of flowing color
the punctuation of words
paints yellows and reds
and deep deep blues
slices the dream into sides
so that we may hold hands
look deeply into each other's eyes
recognize the impossible mystery of beauty
and fall in love






wind
its own breath
slides rippling shadows 
across the sidewalk and into a deep deep river of light
pouring into light

autumn does not hold its breath
waiting for spring
leaves fall
gather in the garden
moon swept echoes
sing

love is not hiding
under the bushes
among broken shadows
and stalks of summer flowers
heavy with afternoon rain

it is the falling of ancient moonlight
and the winter's breath approaching
love is your very breath
these very words
this kiss
of knowing life's preciousness

and what of the golden finches
asleep in the plum tree
as naked moon
sails


do the seasons orbit around the sun?
is there someone walking away from autumn?
where does winter hide in the spring?

frozen garden lies in darkness
no tires on the highway 
spoonfuls of hot tea
my reflection in the window
memories of moon hover
sliding through the seasons

what is light
but ancient shadows
leaning
into the wind
bursting into flames

what is love
but memories of light
leaning 
into this fiery kiss
burning all shadows
in this echo land dream

there is no place to hide
from this explosion of love
it is everywhere
and nowhere
it lies in your sickbed
and flows through your dreams
as you wander
looking for love


my heart is a river of echoes
memories reverberate
without a source
or place to land

the banks collapsed 
into the fathomless depths
sky
slipped into wetness
currents
warm and cool
pour through eddies
and whirlpools
in this ocean of love

I am all the voices
of all the songs
the singers
and the silent 
a billion stars exploding
suns melting into their own light
galaxies unfolding
and collapsing
waves of tears
folding into pools of starlight

wild and naked
life sings our names
a call and answer long song
we are echoes
of reflected light



River of moon 
Sinks into sky
Who wandered the empty shores of moonlight?
Who sailed among ancient shadows searching for love?
Leaving no wake
She found no harbor
Simply sky
Pouring into sky
Vast
Anchor-less
Dreams of clouds
Drifting...
No banks
No light
No shadow 
No love
Just this sensuous daydream 
Dreaming itself
A love ballet that has no horizon...
No vault of sky to fall
No dance floor to collapse

Oceans dissolving
Suns melting
Castles crumbling
Lovers loving
Falling through their own embrace



morning sleeps 
silent snow
dove at the feeder

wet
slides down the window
tears are prisms
colors blossom
petals fall
love blossoms
love falls
pools of memory
slide down the window
the heart is not a vessel
love slides into and through
love

you cannot hide in hymns and rosaries
cathedrals topple
secret pockets are emptied
there are no clothes
to hide the nakedness
that no one wears

summer flowers
bloom and
wilt
colors 
now
buried in snow
a dream of time
and love's embrace
painted by these very words









Friday, November 15, 2019

I am the perfume of a flower that never bloomed

how empty the moon

night

without crickets



wind that was not there
blew away the dark
ignited embers of day
unwrapped the prisms of your eyes
unleashing color
and sound
into this ballet of echoes ever blooming
...ever wilting
petals of desert flowers
pressed into a flowing rosary
there is no prayer that will halt or capture
this shimmering mirage
thin white fingers of clouds
flow through the desert dream
wind does not push them
they do not move
or exist
without thought

in this death of yesterdays
and all tomorrows
stars lost their handholds
as there was no night to cling to
and no empty hand to grasp the flowing
this magician's dream coat
has no dreamer
all is sourceless reflections
spinning the day dream
as well as the night dream
this watercolored magnificence
unties the shadows
and light
collapses into itself
leaving not a breath
or ripple
of wind


day melts into dusk
hovers on the horizon
ripped with rain

architecture of trees
holding up the sky
and stars blooming
lace my window

swirling watercolor
wetness slides into wetness
dark into dark
I am a flowing reflection
on a mirror without sides

day sleeps in the heart of night
no one awakens from this echo land dream
sailing shadows leak into light
rustling leaves in autumn wind
night nestles under wings of dawn


Self is belief in imaginary separation, the dream of belief in the dream. As human beings life is full of deep deep despair and suffering and unimaginable joy. It is exceedingly painful to believe in the dream of separation, yet not believing it is the dream as well. Trying to change or get rid of or get out of the dream is a most painful part of the dream, yet the dream character often spends most of 'their life' in this conundrum, solidifying their imaginary walls by trying to erase them, seemingly blocking out the light, and the love that is always there... 
but there is no darkness to erase, no hand nor heart to capture light or love...

It is knowing that as imaginary characters we all share this humanness... of great despair and joy, and the knowing of our ultimate aloneness that brings great compassion, and an unconditional love. These feelings often begin to arise as we share these great sorrows of illness and death.

Awakening is not the end of joy and sorrow and love... it is a merging of the sea and sky and earth, of up and down and in-between, of time and timelessness, of all ends and beginnings...
and yet somehow it is the ever blooming ever wilting kiss within a kiss of loving deeply, unashamedly, the whole shaboogie. 
We get to feel it all, all the joy all the pain...
When you suffer, I suffer.



I am this cascade of thought
memories of long trails of geese
heading south
heading north
what is up
what is down
is there an in between?
this vacancy cannot find itself
nothing can be lost 
or found
slipping over the edge there are no edges to be found

time lost its shadow
as it fell into a song
I can no longer find
my lips and teeth and tongue
mouth the words
the roundness of vowels
tumble onto this page
scattered among the consonants
like flesh on bones
the dance begins 

golden finches carry morning into the garden
colors slide into fallen leaves
perfectly formed
as they are crumpled
under the last
falling leaves


wind sighs 
it's lonely dance
beckons the autumn moon
no one leads and no one follows
elegant shadows of naked trees
spin and twirl on the bedroom floor

edgeless silhouette of light in light
basks in its own reflection
there is no center nor edge to this dream of waltzing shadows
nor source of light
only the magical prism of your eyes
explode this rainbow wonder
and paint beauty into a flowing water color dream scape
thought forms and embraces you from the inside and out, 
an imaginary dancer
of wind
in wind

this silence beyond imagination is always singing
beckoning you to dance
it has no words
yet is every word
weaving horsetails into wind
who is it that runs naked through the fields?


elegant 
the rough seas
battering tall cliffs
into lace
falling

sea foam
clouds
and wind
comb the beaches
for tide pools
to admire their reflection
passing by

fingerprint of time
lost its delicate tracery
wind blown clouds
dissolve
into their own echos

sky breathes
its empty breath
sucks you in
and you never return

you were never more
or less
substantial
than yesterday's skies




There is a feeling of beyond freedom or bondage as it’s noticed more and more that life... Thought happens all by itself. 
A noticing that ‘before’ (recognizing this is a story) there was an effort to control... perpetuating the painful yet comfortable illusion of a controller...
That all of this self arises and self erases simultaneously... 

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Without time or non time...
Without a source.......

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....
Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

Not appearing out of anything or emptiness or anywhere 
There is no anywhere or nowhere...
Nor any things 
Nor non things.....

There is no need to have a thing or someone recognizing this....
It is evident as itself 
It simply is
Without being or not being so
It is 
....of itself so....
All of a piece without edges
Echoes of echoes of echoes...
Reflections of reflections of reflections

No space to be filled 
No emptiness to be filled 
No thing to be full 
Or empty 

This flowing thought dream continues 
How marvelously 
Without movement or non movement 
It is no longer believed 
There is no believer....

Tosses and turns into the swirls of your fingertips 
The waves on the sea...
The wind blowing through the dead leaves still hanging from the trees 
A few seem to be caught and dance with the dawn as they float 
Lovingly
Kissing the naked earth
Waiting for the neighbor kids to joyfully shuffle their feet through the autumn splendor on their way to school....
Yes 
A story
All is
The story of knowing you and all you have ever loved is a beautiful heartbreaking fairytale....


It just feels like sky pouring into sky, space pouring into space, light pouring into light, emptiness pouring into emptiness. But there is no light, nor space, nor emptiness. This dream does not arise from no-thingness; it does not arise from emptiness. it is emptiness itself, and it cannot be captured or held...this is all illusion. Illusion is illusion, magnificent and wondrous beyond measure. 
Wow! 

words like
stars 
strewn across the vault of sky
beyond which
there is more beyond
painted by words
that seem to form patterns
and stories
of lonesome lovers who try to escape their story
and their brilliance
scorning love
or longing for it
we are the dreams of lovers

starlight

dancing



ghost light sweeps across the canyon
naked trees paint empty skies
suspended as this very hush
wild 
abandon
dances

river of forever pours into never
slides along
twirling moonlight
into memories
of forgotten shadows
melting into their own light

we seem to stand on the banks
of life
wishing to fall in
but we have never been separate from the river
there is no one to be apart or to merge with the flowing

we exist as the imaginary banks
and as these lines
we can never meet
as the river
we are never separate



imaginary separation... a prism of unthinkable beauty separating an 'inside' and an 'outside'.... obvious aliveness ....dancing with its reflection... an echo's dream... where no things can be found.. yet all things seem to appear.... knowing not how this is known... as there is no feeling of a know-er, or a feel-er... or a someone who is in utter awe... it feels like a love dream ballet.... without a dance floor or curtains, space without space... breathing aching touching its own aliveness... a kiss without lips....

wet in wet in wet in wet
love dances with its own echo... and no edges to be found in this kiss that stops time as it erases itself ...lost in the blue of a never arising horizon


last cricket fades into autumn moon
feathered hands of summer grasses
floating
acres of yesterdays are buried under the shadows
clouds blossom and tumble into the silver river
rippling waters dissolve their empty reflection

who hung her heart on the naked trees
while she searched for her own reflection?
trails of memory led nowhere
echoes of love filled the canyon 
and died
her path collapsed under the lightness of no tomorrow
untraceable
life pirouettes into itself 


wind slips though it’s own lips
suspended in morning light
silently 
the canyon’s embrace
exhales into desert sands 

river flows into its own echo
boundless
ocean of love
pours into itself 

time lost its heartbeat
as its shadow danced in the dark
noon fell through midnight
a million shooting stars
dissolved into their own light 

where are the fingers that cannot touch
where are the lips that cannot kiss
there is no heart that can hold
all
this
love

without sound or silence
echoes shimmer
moon sinks into its own light
reflection without a face
glimpses its own countenance

tears have no source
all is a fountain of measureless treasure
unfathomable
this vast
vast
spaciousness
without space
ricocheting waves of wet
in wet
in wet
in wet

there is no surface
or bottom
or shore
all is in
without an inside
there is nothing but this
ocean of love



I am the perfume of a flower that never bloomed