The Sound of the Universe Weeping at its Own Beauty

You know life is precious and you want to hold on to it 

If it could be grasped 

You would have to be separate from it 

Life in your pocket 

A pinned butterfly

Has not the preciousness you seek.  

You are the fleeting beauty of life 

Kissing itself 

Through your lips 

Your song 

Singing you 

Who would want to grow a garden of cement flowers 

even plastic flowers fade like old love songs... the beauty is in the impermanency you fear and long for 

Footsteps in the dark 

Echoes on the sand 

No waves can be lost or found 

In this sea of dreams 

The call of your loneliness 

Comes back to you 

The sound of the universe weeping 

At its own beauty  

All the love you longed to feel yet you were terrified to lose explodes and implodes in your chest.  Your heart breaks so deeply the very core of your being is severed.  All that you thought you were becomes a backward glance behind a mirror that has shattered into infinite sparkles dancing on an edgeless sea.  It is the kiss of death, this love that eviscerates you, your lips your skin your teeth your mouth your heart your very breath is no longer yours. Belonging to no one this love is everywhere and no where.  Streaming through you as you this seamless Kiss of Joy of sorrow of nothing at all.  

Silver light
sliding water
No moon
No sun
No sky

Tears
Love’s jewelry
Your only adornment

Prisms loosed their color on the glass
That broke
When you drank your reflection

In the dead of night
No hope
No fear
No time

Walking
Through memories of moon
A shadow resplendent in its own light

Summer sun dances
In pools of whispers
You know the words
You cannot echo
They fill your chest
As it explodes
Into the treasure
Of simply this 

Sea slammed you into sky 

Sky into sea

In this utter vacancy between the horizon
Where there is no sorrow nor joy nor love 

nor anyone to feel 

nor anywhere

nor anywhen 

Midnight heard it’s echo in this ancient song 

Of vast desert wastelands
Of waves of endless sand and ocean 

and sky

the never remembered never forgotten all embracing kiss. 

You have never left
Nor entered 

There is no door or window or wall 

This infinite spaciousness has 

No ceiling 

No floor 

No path 

No way 

Running and laughing through the shallow waves 

Sun smiles 

A child picks up a shell 

 

Your very own heartbeat 

the song of the universe

Fluidity of life has no edges 

No beginning nor end 

No observer can be found 

Outside and inside emerge in thought. 

Is the breeze separate from your skin?  

Is this sweetness separate from your tongue? 

Is red separate from the rose? 

Words write the story of time and place and you and me.  There is no outside to this conceptual reality thought paints, but you know that what’s actually going on cannot be caught by thought.  What if red were a thing you could hold?  What if the wind could be caught?  Where would you put it?  

All stories are maps within the dream.  There is no edge to fall off.  All signs are pointers point back to the dream. There really is nothing solid and stable and fixed.  No reference points whatsoever.  Even the you that feels so solid, can you really find anything unchanging?  Or is there simply a flow of memory thought sensation that seem to create a fleeting image, a flowing description of a person looking for an answer an understanding a place to rest and knowing deeply, perhaps fearing and hoping, that there is none, and no one to have it. 

Fully alive fully human 

Not looking for freedom knowing there is no one to be free 

There is a boundless intimacy to life 

First crows 

first light 

Soft breath of my husband 

Waves and waves and waves 

A distant fishing boat heading out to sea.

This beauty this beauty this beauty

Life happening all by itself 

Joy Sorrow Love

loss of love

life and death 

We share this beautiful humanness

This ache of our aliveness.

Most spend their entire lives looking for more or better, in constant hope and fear of a never arising next.  Missing the obvious always on beauty and magic and awe of being aware of being aware.   

No other better more or next.

Simply this 

Life streaming through you as you.

Through the marvelous imaginary conceptual reality of this and that occurring in the human brain, there arises the most precious gem in the universe.  Awareness aware of being aware. 

When imaginary separation is believed it is exceedingly painful 

When not 

Unspeakably marvelous

Words cannot capture this awe

Like love like bliss like joy

Your world collapsed 

The curtain pulled back 

There was nothing left

No one to wear the clothes of meaninglessness 

Time fell through time 

Slipped through timelessness 

Sound reverberated in its own absence 

Light reflected its own luminescence 

Night spiraled into the echo of day 

Beauty melted the edges between I am and we are.

This tornado of song that splits not even nothing into everything remains as you lightly step out into the edgelessness every footfall blooms into an unknowable universe singing with an unspeakable iridescence.  You are this raw nakedness 

feeling deeply 

No one wears it 

There are no secret pockets to hide in

No one left to hide 

Life ignites itself as it flows through you 

unafraid of love 

Of life 

Of death 

It’s all the dream 

Even not believing in the dream 

Is the dream 

Step-less wonder 

Cloud castles sailing through blue forming dissolving kissing the sun.  constant disbelief, a most delicious unknowing, dancing in footless shoes.

And loving love like crazy

Across the horizon
Birds awaken
What is the song of darkness
When no one is listening?

Midnight reveals
star-songs
What is the sound of wonder
When it has no name?

footfalls in the dark
Echo in your empty heart
Love washed away in the tides
Of longing

It cannot be found
As it is everywhere
And no where
It kisses you full on the mouth
And breathes you 

I spent many nights laying on a bed of nails 

Gripped by unseen unknown terror

This is the part most teachers will never talk about

But I do

Enlightenment is not a walk in the park 

Or an understanding reached by armchair discussions. 

Or slipping into s state of bliss through constant mediation.

All your ideas about who you are and what the world is like or supposed to 

be are being ripped apart 

As that is what you are 

Ideas 

It hurts like hell when you are beginning to realize that you are nothing more than a flowing fluid thought dream. 

It feels like dying 

But it’s realized you never had any actual existence at all.

It’s the end of the belief and feeling of thingness.

There are no reference points whatsoever 

And no one to grab one.

bittersweet joy
beautiful sorrow 

Sublime aloneness 

Weeps 

An edgeless emptiness that cannot be filled 

No bottom to this treasure chest 

Of your heart 

No words can slide into unknowingness 

To erase your shadow 

wind sighs across the canyon 

Laughing and weeping at the beauty of echoes