I Am A Song Of Wind Written With Wind In Wind

I Am A Song Of Wind 

Written With Wind 

In Wind

The dream dreams itself 

The story writes itself and calls it a story

This is a love story that no one is writing

or reading

or listening to the clicks of they keys of the computer...

Enlightenment is the dream as well 

Love the most beautiful part of the dream Beauty

Well

Beauty sings itself

With every word

Or non word

Uttered

Through whose lips...

As lips are a story

As is this kiss...

There are no two to meet and fall in love We can never touch

As we are the imaginary sides of a canyon Echoes that have no source

A call and answer love song

hello goodbye hello....

Crashing through the mirror and finding there is no one on the other side As all sides disappear

Along with the middle

 My story sang of love

and then skirted around that word as I heard false gurus tell people they were love,

(just another handhold)

yet I could find no other word that would suffice

This is the end of love

And the beginning

The end of all ideas and belief about love As love erases itself

Love sings itself...

The thought stream has changed, the story of wind has shifted... there is no worry yet there is thought about an imaginary past and an imaginary future, and a non existent now...

the idea that there are separate things and events and time seems foreign... it is like there is no one to believe thought, no one to take it personally or not...

the endless loop of self judgement and self correction was broken... the constant taking of an imaginary happiness temperature, trying to contrive or keep ‘good’ thoughts and emotions and trying to replace ‘bad’ ones stopped.... all the ‘shoulds’ stopped, there is never any thought about how life or the world or others should be or could be.... all at once the thought stream changed

and as I am this thought dream

I have changed...

I am an afterimage of love's demise the shimmering of starlight without stars

a great wind blew through my brain and erased all knowing and longing to capture the magic

and now it simply sings love songs

Life is perfection is effortless-ness

It is not laziness, it is the knowing and feeling that there is no one doing life and that life is not happening to anyone...

or no one...

Seamlessly without edge or center

Or beginning or end

Without movement or non movement

Life flows without any effort or non effort... amazing!

 As the fairy tale girl was a dream of constant effort... of constantly trying to feel good, to find peace and love...

looking for love was the story of wind...

looking for the awe she remembered...

like fading into sleep and almost hearing a song on the under breath of a passer by....

trying to capture and hold the magic the majesty the wonderment of life and seemingly pushing it away...

the dream of separation is no longer believed... nor the edgeless-ness....

neither complete

nor incomplete echoes of a sideways sun

this awe never ceases.... the knowing feeling of utter perfection.... love swooning in love with itself through our eyes

suspended between the known worded world and this delicious unknowing.... amazed at amazement

In love with love

There is never boredom, I find myself weeping even looking at the ceiling 

This vibrant aliveness...

Unfathomably measureless...

Marvelously unknowable....

Yet with imaginary separation (the dream) there arises an awareness of aliveness.. an awareness of awareness... and this is how love and beauty enter the dream... through our eyes, a prism of color arises... through this marvelous thought stream things seem to appear and interact and swim and dance and suns and moons

soar

and starlight pours through the tall trees... that have never held the sky... sky swallowed me long ago and spit me out...

yet I am ever sky swooning through sky...

although there is never anyone swooning nor a sky to dance...

nor wind to push and pull the clouds...

I am the wind as the wind flows through me... transparent iridescence of space falling through space...

without space...

It seems that I arise in this dance of you and me and we... but we cannot be found... or lost

an echo a mirage ...a magicians’s tale... a reflection of a hologram ... not anywhere nor no where...

not as anything nor as nothing....

love awe sorrow joy have merged love flowing into itself without love

or the lack of love

there is no one to be empty nor full...

other dream time characters seem to speak to me and my mouth appears to answer...

or kiss....

...or sing...

This fairy tale girl has changed dramatically since she fell from the sky... It feels like a constant falling in love with all that seems to appear and all who appear

in this love dance that we are

always the first and last kiss

I am a flowing of many stories

a color picture book with three d images and bits of tears and smiles and songs painted on liquid pages

an ocean of song

dissolving into itself

my heart knows all the words

they are me

pigeons on the pier wrapped in their own softness their warmth caress me wind and sun and waves crashing

falling back into the sea

where does distance reside in the far flung sky?

This is the end of my seventh book of songs of awakening and I have never captured even one bite of this deliciousness... Yet songs flow through me and even as these words appear my story writes itself.

day is lost in her own shadow
sudden gust of plum blossoms

listen
to the song of moon
pulling
tides
pouring
blood
rushing
softly
as oceans
soar
through our minds




what is the scent of the full moon
as she falls through the horizon?

hush of dawn
echoes

first light
sweeps down the canyon
pours through the empty garden
no path can be found




almost dawn
words brush my lips

in the shadows
soft breath of rain




birds finally settle
through
wind
and weeping trees
sun sets

low howl
of moon
waits
for cricket song

in between the silence
laying in the long summer grasses
darkness breathes




arched by wind
one fragile wing
caught in between the sidewalk cracks

desolate sky
descends
breaks its scaffolding of dusk

hands cannot gather the darkness
nor dispel it

a lifetime of reaching for love
was love itself
returning
to a home it never left

cone of yarn
half crocheted into sweater
bathed in lamp light

I am the memory of rainbows

falling

love songs slide through me and write my lines

canyon wren sings her notes of sky 

descending

into sky

she cannot be found

we are words

like stars strewn across the heavens

lassoed into stories of mythical proportions

I am a story book woman

written with starlight

on starlight

the longing to find her

and carry her song with me always

is gone

yet she is is part of me

as are you

I can hear all our names

the names of names

part our lips

as songs escape our hearts

words are their own echo

we are this very love song 

that sings itself

echoes sail on canyon winds

like distant shadows

colors in the dark

wind slides through wind

suspended in the soft slumber of moon

rain hides under the fallen leaves

listen

suspended inside the colors of

no moon

weeping

on the edge of sky

falling

into

oceans

streaming into oceans

weaving waving echoes

the arch of heaven collapses into rainbow reflection

there is nothing

inside my face in the mirror

nor outside

no bird sings

yet I can hear her song

echo

there is the branch where she perched

waving in the wind

I am the memory of an echo I never heard

of a place I never went

of a tear I never shed

of a love I never felt

of a song I never sang…

I was an echo looking for a sound that rang true

in a world of echoes

without sound

or silence

or echoes

without truth or falsehood

ocean of love drinks itself

I am this very song that sings me

such undeniable aliveness!

this intoxicating passion play

a scrumptious water color dream

dreams itself

love falls in love

with itself

through this dance this chorus this echo land dream scape

of one

of two

of many

of none

sunset streams through the storm

rain

shadows

bloom in our eyes

dawn sleeps

bathed in bareback moon

riding low slung clouds

soft shell light

opalescent shadows

bloom

and fade

into their own darkness

a life of effort

unravels

sun crochets a leaf

then two

a trunk appears

no one was needed

to hold up the sky

shorebirds sleep

cricket song ricochets into its own echo

silence swallows even the night

I was a flowing book of un-answered love letters

spilling out into the night

burning the candle

and the pen that wrote them

the pages of my life had always seemed too small to hold it 

or keep out the rain

...or keep me from drowning

paper boats dissolve

and paper hats melt

words themselves hold no weight

have no substance

yet seem to create it

my story writes itself

spilling vowels and consonants through my lips

my heart appears to know the words

my limbs sway to a music

that only they can hear

and I am sky

drenched with sky

dissolved yet dancing

in love with the dance that I am

that we are

reflections entwined

in our own

hush

in our own

beauty

in our own

light

in our own

love

rain 

roses

petals in the mud

peering into infinity’s gaze

love's heart magic pierces you 

pries apart the bars of your heart

there is no barrier

between you

and love

all that you feared and all that you longed for

raw and naked

in the still evening wind

soaring through the hush of moon

ocean of love streams through itself

river of thought has no one to surf it

no one to believe it

no place from where it comes

or leads

its very words create things like beginnings

and endings

thought paints thought itself

the dream dreams itself

love

sings

love

no one missed the sunset last night

it bathes us

always

love burns itself

I am an afterimage of love's demise

the shimmering of starlight

without stars

she tried to drink the blue of sky

without sky

swallow the emptiness of space

without space

without emptiness...

she tried to find the love in love

eyes and fingers burning with a wetness

beyond tears

beyond wetness

beyond beyond

beyond even love

the taste of taste

the blueness of blue

cannot be removed or added

nothing can

there is no blue

nor green

nor purply clouds drifting through the sunset

colors are a lover's dream

like all light and shadow and shapes

playing the backbeat on an imaginary timeline

between birth and death

a tightrope

a knife blade of thought

slices your heart into pieces

and your world into infinite things

love washes through you

and leaves no trace

no kiss upon your shoulder

no fingerprint upon the wetness

of wet

this liquidity of life

of love

pours through love

saturates the sky

with blue

blossoms

falling

through long leafy shadows

cascading on the sidewalk

water color dream sails through itself

soft shell light

clouds soaring

moon on the silvery sea

tissue of the palest blue

melts into sky

layer by layer

as morning sings itself into day

one by one

words paint the flowing

streaming words like flowing

and painting

and number

and words...

dots indicate a pause

an in breath

exhales you

into this world of floating shadows and light

a someone who peers into a vast cloud bank of memory

and is walking toward a point on a distant horizon called death 

this preciousness of life is obvious

you have known it as soon as you were painted into this water color dream

watching your hands grasp the cup

feeling your lips hungrily drinking the water

tasting the wine

intoxicated with life

knowing this treasure you feared its demise

you might have asked

where did it come from

where will it go?

where did I come from

where will I go?

fear drives the seeking for other better more and next

but there is no next

you know that

and there are gurus and priests who will tell you 

you will never die

and you want to believe them...

no belief is ever quite believed

there is no believer

only a crumbling sand castle

and waves

and wind

and more thought tumbling into thought

spinning a tapestry as it unravels

colored with threads that have no name nor number

tattered prayer flags

bleeding sky into sky

this water color painting is a river of thought

you cannot cross

or surf

or step out of

you are it

it has no direction

as direction is a thought

it has no end

as end is a thought

it is not even an it

as it is a thought

thought is a thought

marvelously life sings itself

love dreams itself

and we are the marvel of life

tasting itself

love

falling in love with itself

low waves wing across the wet sands

purple now in the dusk

pushing

pulling

sliding through each other

bathing in each other's delight

breath of sea

breath of wind

breath of flowing sand

filagree of shadows

wind and leaves and street lights dancing

space without design or number 

or space

flows through you

and you cannot find your footfalls

among the swirling

consumed by love’s vast emptiness

thought no longer seeks the origin of color

it continues to spin the dream

spiderwebs caught in the long grasses

shimmer in the wet dawn

eastern winds ignite drops of starlight

emblazoned in your eyes

it is sorrow

it is joy

it is fire

it is love

it is all the stories of everyone who has ever loved

and lost love

it is a chorus of you and me and we

infinite tears coalescing in an edgeless ocean

we are the dream of love

a wind song

written with wind

in

wind

rich scent of forgotten 

flowers

blooming 

sea birds in the mist

ancient songs fell through at midnight

dissolved

once again by morning

words cannot be caught

even in these lines

sound of golden

dusts the garden

dawn moves through pale rivers

glistening

night slumbers

hidden in the shadows

our voices bathe in infinite drops of moon

we are the cascading of a thousand echos

through the heavens

through the clouds

and sunlight

we are rainbows shimmering

reflections streaming

seas floating in liquid skies

we are the songs of vast edgeless oceans

shallow currents surfing

fathomless depths

sea of love slides through itself

and sings

you know her song

it is in your heart always

it sings you to sleep at night

and kisses you awake in the morning

it is undeniable

but cannot be found

or caught

as this song of love is you

you recognize this beauty

you recognize this love

as you are it

it cannot be found

or captured

and put on the mantle

trying to find it

pushes it away

paints an empty hand

and empty heart

longing to be filled

you are the quest for an ever receding horizon

there is no horizon

where the sea slides into sky

and sky plunges into sea

the named places are made up

as is time

as are you and me

and love

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.........

this amazing unknowable undeniable aliveness!

what more could you ask for!

what else is there?

long impossibly thin stem

empty now

of her crowning glory

carpet of petals

wind

filagree of space

has no shadow

has no light

has no space

to fall through

my eyes caress all I see

all I see caresses me

a life of not knowing

is a life of wonderment

gently

gently

rainbows

falling

time

a waltzing daydream

a dance

a trick of thought

a spinning thought castle

crumbling into itself

tall trees at sunset

light and shadow

flowing

through your feet

swirling mnemonic dream scape

of a path

and someone walking

a rhythmic pulse

of night and day

shimmering echoes of words

that have no solidity

your heartbeat

your breath

has no before

or after

can you find your footfalls from last nights dream?

sky leaks into the painting

colors lift off the page

what is the blue in blue?

is blue separate from the seeing of it?

are you the seeing

or the blue

infinitely simply

infinitely complex

a gazillion words can never capture wonder

yet wonder is a word

every word spells love

yet this love has no words

this worded world is the only world we can know

love letters paint light and shadow

and colors

dancing

letters unsigned

letters unwritten

letters cast by no one into a sea that has no shore

nor surface

nor bottom

nor water

ocean of love

dissolves all echos

consumes its own reflection

love sings love's demise

and its simultaneous birth

I am a love letter slipping off the page

through its own words

mysterious are all words

uttered or not...

what is it that they grasp

other than our hearts?

calligraphy of unwritten shadows

played my heart song

and plunged me into an abyss of unknowing

handfuls of wetness

poured through my fingers

oceans of tears

washed the edges from my mind

time collapsed

the scaffolding of the world crumbled

floating in a canyon of echoes

I can hear love singing in the drifting sunlight

breathing waterfalls of color into the dream

sky cascades into sky

light

falls

through me

scent of evening shadows

glow

ghost of a dream paints memory

floating brush strokes of space

between here

and there

painting in the sound of midnight

notes of infinite color

stream through rainbows

falling

delicate shell light of reflections

pours through an echo of moon....

bathes in pools of ancient starlight

reverberating in the placeless place between

you

and me

I am a filagree of light and shadow

dancing between an echo's dream

and a love song

of unfathomable beauty

that is always heard

yet never sung

golden streams through the window

husband awakes

love at first sight

again and again

and

again

soft wind carries the echo of moon

caressed by darkness

no longer longing for light

immeasurably small

and intoxicatingly large

love no longer fits into her shadow

her breath is your breath

out

and in

where is silence hidden

when there is no one listening?

clothed in tides

the sea appears to greet itself

on the sand

by the cliffs

in secret harbors...

in pools of reflections

where the last drops of sunset bathe

what is a river without its banks?

how will it find the sea?

what is this edgeless-ness

but love?

in the morning my husband sings the owl's song to me

wild eyes of midnight moon

I am a flowing of many stories

a color picture book with three d images and bits of tears and smiles and songs painted on liquid pages

an ocean of song

dissolving into itself

my heart knows all the words

they are me

pigeons on the pier

wrapped in their own softness

their warmth caress me

wind and sun and waves

crashing

falling back into the sea

where does distance reside in the far flung sky?

mockingbird sings from the tall swaying palm

I lay inside

listening to the day

listen to itself

no one sleeps inside you

waiting to be born

there are no numbers

not even one

or zero

there are no colors

not even black

or white

or long thin purply clouds at sunset

dragons playing in the

fires

burning

an exhale of all this

leaves no one breathing

no one singing

and no emptiness to fill

tires on the road at midnight

still awake

to the scent of shadows burning

and the bloom of this ever present wonder

swooning into petals of exquisite tenderness

or are they tears

love wears no clothes

nor nakedness

ahhhhhhhh......

this streaming dream

a necklace of mirrors

crashing into infinite rainbows

falling through shards of a midnight

so dark

you thought you heard your lover calling

but could not remember her voice

echoes across the sea

never did find their source

you were waiting

and waiting

for your own return

your footsteps drowned in sand

your voice in wind

memory sang your name

but all you could vaguely recall was the scent of moon Lillies

blooming

your heart

bursting

open

to the dream of un-knowing

and the wonder of it all

trees drank my shadow

hungrily 

like a child learning words

softly

softly

running through the forest

echoes cannot be held by echoes

first the trees filled in the darkness

then the darkness filled itself

drank the day deeply

where nothing was tied to its reflection 

nakedly

quietly

love slips her face into every mirror

no one wears this mask of infinite beauty

tied by ribbons of thought

coalescing into images

flowing

dissolving

into words

into soft rounded vowels

and click-ety consonants

held in the womb of your mouth

between the hardness of your teeth

you feel your heart say the words

you have always longed to hear

welcome home

I've missed you

looking for love

you can only see yourself

yet there is no one to be seen

or look

are there separate stars

or just starlight?

are there separate lovers

or just love?

between thingness and no thingness

love rests

in thingness and every thingness

love rests

for no reason nor non reason

love embraces itself through our eyes our lips our tears  our smiles... 

our shared humanness is what we are

this dream that dreams itself

this water color passion play that paints itself

and erases itself

without time or non time

the river flows

hello

good bye

hello

no inside no outside nor middle eight

the song sings itself

and it sounds like love to me

my eyes caress the world as the world caresses me

my lines never were

yet they dissolved a long time ago

there is no need to remember the words

as the words remember me

magically the wind sings my name

and I am the wind singing

silhouette of sky

melts into its own echo

and it is all marvelous beyond measure

naturally perfect

without perfection nor imperfection

without movement nor non movement

love flows

what is the sound of sky

falling

through sky

how do echoes bloom

when there is no sound

or silence?

a young girl walks by humming under her breath

we are memories

flowing

we are the shimmering of starlight

when there are no stars...

streetlights caress the sidewalk

a man leans down to touch his shadow

he cannot capture

his own light

under the wind

there are is no moon tonight

it seems I heard shadows

singing

under her breath

inside your heart

can you hear

the night weeping?