one car on the distant road
headlights on the canyon wall
from where to where
can anyone travel?
memories sink into the slip stream of words
whirlpools of echoes swirl your reflection
eddies cannot hide this sublime melancholy
not lost
not found
dark in light
light in dark
moon left her shadow under the fallen leaves
deep in the garden
under evening's footsteps
where I lost the path
to midnight
this trail of words
follows itself
leaving only its shadow upon this page
dissolving in its own light
light a word
word a word
love a word
there was no one to lose
or set free
no one wandered
intoxicated with the evening falling
into its own shadow
naked trees adorned with moon glow
clouds swallowed the light
and the rain
brushing my hand across the water
never caught the morning
reflecting love's beauty
my eyes light the sun
I am a mirror
of cloud reflections
of love's kiss
upon the day
I don't know how belief in thought ends...
it is not belief in thought only, it is the belief in belief that ceases in the brain...
no one attaches or dis-attaches...
it feels like endless knots untying...
like the strings that held the sun and moon and you into place dissolving.....
like the inside and outside of a bubble merging... pierced by love's arrows....
the skin the teeth the eyes the blood the bone the marrow of your existence ripping apart...
the unravelling of endless fairy tales about who you are and what the world is like...
until there is not even nothing left
no reference points whatsoever
no things nor non things
no goal to reach
no path to tread
no ground to land on
no one to land...
yet you remain
the beautiful swirling iridescence
colors on a bubble
dividing an imaginary inside and outside
painting love and beauty into the dream
knowing you are the dream
makes it all the more wondrous
Knowing and feeling that there are no separate things or non-things or moments or events or selves or others
or you or me or love
simply feels like love
Unbound vast spaciousness swirling diving into it self
kissed from the inside from the outside
until all sides are dissolved
And love the best part of the dream
in love as love through love
my heart weeps
Such a sensuous lostness
no longer needing to be found
and yet I catch a glimpse of my own beauty in your scintillating loving eyes
Reflections slide through reflections there never were any sides to the mirror nor a middle but there is a window
A barrier
A flowing net of words
As we are these imaginary lines we can never truly touch
How beautiful these tears that reflect the song of moon
Of love and love lost and love remembered
Weaving the fabric of our being....
There really are no words for this
But love seems to work just fine
In this great battle
No one fights
Or wins
Or loses
Blood is spilt
Hearts are lost
Bones are burned under the midnight moon
And the wind blows the ashes
And the grasses grow
And the long stemmed flowers
Lanterns in the summer sun
Wave in the wind
Softly tearing the gentlest of hearts
This unsung beauty
That ripped all ideas of beauty
This love
That conquered all ideas of love
Has no words
Yet is all words
I did not win this kiss of wind
That blew my heart into the pyre
I did not climb the mountain
As it crumbled into the sea
The tsunami of love
Crushed all and everything
Even these hands that type these words
Are not mine
This life never had a name
Shall I speak of it
Without one
My mouth holds its vowels
Round and juicy
My breath my lips sing
I love you
I love you
I love you
Midnight rain
Autumn dawn
Autumn dawn
Through the window
The scent of fallen leaves
Vast
Endless road is empty
No one wanders
All is home
Clad in autumn flowers
The scent no tomorrow
Cloud hewn
Sky
wind slides through wind
though this flesh
through these bones
through these words
that sing of wind
as wind sings me
heart beaten clouds
ravished by memory
dissolve into sky
rain tattered tears
flow into the sea scape
painted on the window
colors run through the gathering rainbow
falling gently though the canyon
through these eyes
though this heart
through this love
of all things
And love turns around and falls into and through its own empty arms
Weeping
Love stretched out her hand... it was no longer an invitation ignored... there was no longer an option to run away from the giant hole in my heart...
or join in the dance...
She grabbed me and flung me off the rocky cliffs into the vast sea below... just in time for the tsunami I had felt was coming my entire life...
I feared it and longed for it...
There was no going back
...there was no back...
The sound of weeping
…far far away
and the feeling that tears were happening to a me
Got closer and closer until there was no distance
No here nor there
Nor in between
Smiles and sorrows merged... the ghost that carried them dissolved
Hunger and fullness slid into each other into an ecstatic love dance where the stars in my eyes, in everyone’s eyes, and the lights in the midnight sky shimmer in this empty heart
They are the tears of beauty and wonder reflecting on the evening tide...
No one wanders the empty beach through the dunes and depressions
No one leaves these footprints that no longer go in circles
Yet I watch my feet know exactly what to do.... and as I run with the wind
I am the wind....
autumn clouds
morning hides
fallen petals
hold no color
naked stems bow
mirror memory
on the icy pond
I watch steam from my tea
take the shape of flowers
and dissolve into my reflection
in the window
what hides in this drop of dew
melting on the empty branch
what was never lost
cannot be found
strangely familiar
this song of mourning
the loss of everything
and nothing
that sings me
autumn rain
I cannot see your tears
wetness
everywhere
And she danced with her shadow on the canyon walls...
In love with the light flowing in around and through her fingers.... her hands her arms her twirling body as she dissolved into sky...
In this dream within a dream within a dream there are endless reverberations of reflections of reflections of reflections...
echoes swirl into and through each other...
Lost and found in a sideways glance
Not forgotten nor remembered
only ever this dream....
Falling through itself
This wind ballet
Of wind in wind in wind
This love dance
Pirouetting into itself
Calling and answering, answering and calling, there are no questions or answers...
Simply words strewn across the canyon like stars flowing across the river of sky...
There is nothing being reflected in these pools of ancient wonder, nor anyone in the canyon singing love songs and watching them dissolve into sky...
She is the kiss of madness, of memory, of sliding scales in atemporal rhythms, of afterimages of moon glow of sun glow of rippling water colors painted with star light on the shimmering dancing stream....
Transparency self releases into transparency and folds back into itself...
And no hands have ever held the moon
Yet its reflection shines in your eyes...
And no one has ever found or lost love
Or held it in the palm of her hand
It is apparent everywhere
And nowhere
In this vacancy of time and space and emptiness
Love sings and listens to your heartbeat
As it answers...
Like this
Like this
Like this....
river of song
river of tears
river of stars
across the night sky
through my shining shadow
dancing in a heartbeat
no space between my heart
and you
A stone in my heart
...In my mouth
So cold!
Love melts
hard consonants
Trying to roll the vowels
With my tongue
Into a sound
That could not weep
Aching for tears
That would not stop....
Tears and their wetness were never separate...
Mountain springs and creeks trickling through wandering meadows...
Pouring into deep deep canyons aching for the sea...
the heart of the earth melts ice and rocks...
In the deepest darkest chasms
Love grows
hush before dawn
even the crickets sleep
young girl across the street
starts her car
pale cold moon
I watch my reflection in the window
light sparkling in the mirrored glass
caressing my face
and the softness of water
unhindered luminosity prevails
super saturating all and everything
there is only this precious indefinable momentary
indivisible, without edges or center
pure, clear, naturally self arising and self releasing
all perception and its inseparable recognition arise unfettered, ungraspable--- amazing!
love's natural radiance is primally clear and obvious at all times!
flawless stainless brilliance is inherent in all thought all sight sound taste touch sensation and feeling...
there are no mistakes nor anyone to make them
the intense lushness of this indivisible momentary sings itself
blooming and wilting without end or beginning
flowing without movement or non moment
this lustrous openness cannot be ignored
it is super complete in all appearances
and inseparable from them
this wondrous aliveness is always on
open sky like vastness perfumes day and night
like sky in sky,
light in light
space in space,
love's gaze self illuminates all and everything
your face your tears your beautiful beautiful tenderness
precious beyond measure
all the riches of the world cannot compare to this wondrous treasure you seek
you cannot find it
nor not find it
you and it are not separate
feeling this aliveness
is it
love sees itself through your eyes
and weeps at its own beauty
Tears have no name nor number
Love sorrow joy awe...
I watch light sparkle and shadow dance and colors merge into rainbow astonishment
around and through my hand as it reaches into sky...
Wind flows through me and I am the wind and this flowing carpet of dancing falling leaves swooshing into dramatic kisses with their shadows on the trail
That no one walks
Not even empty foot prints
No one wonders looking for a place to rest
looking for a home
Home is infinite
Centerless...
And even infinity too small a word for seamless spaciousness adorned with colors and tears and smiles
and love....
And I weep and it is beautiful
Love and love lost....
Even though you may live
Your death is a beautiful part of me
Love is like missing someone....
and it all feels like love to me...
in love as love through love.... a wind ballet of wind in wind...
I keep reading about those who are trying to empty themselves to receive god's love....
this is pure clear and ungraspable... there are no hands to erase hands... no light to erase light.... no song to erase words and music, no lullaby to lure you into where you already are, what this already is... un-stain-able edgeless fluidity, without time or measure.... yet the heartbeat, all this and that, the aliveness you feel is known because of the duality you have heard is somehow bad....
its a love song... and you are the love the lover and the beloved... and it may sound lonely, but it becomes a sublime aloneness... and there are endless tears... such amazing beauty the beauty the beauty the beauty....
all and everything known to be pure fiction, this passion play of one of two of many of none... a hologram of this and that... a magicians tale, a thought dream painting a universe of separate things and time... and lovers spinning across the dance floor that dropped away long ago when love had you pinned... she slaughtered you and pulled out all you thought you knew... and burnt the dregs as the winds...
....ahhhhhhhhhh..... the winds blew away all signs that there had been a dancer, and a lover, and a dreamer of things to come....
yet here we are... dancing...
is night the loss of day
and morning the loss of night?
where does the moonlight go
after it illuminates the garden path
and your feet
walking
and your heart
sinking
into this very silence
that ravishes all ideas of a goal
or a path
or someone walking
first crow
last crow
Yet here we are
Loving each other
An infinite array of colors
Knowing there are no separate colors
A Swimming thought stream
Of shared learned words
Light and shadow itself
Simply description
How wondrous
I watch my thumb on the screen type I love you and it’s all a swoon swooning through itself
And is that not a lovers dance...
How beautiful
pools of moonlight in your hand
in your eyes
in your heart
is its vanishing
its empty breath
paints the garden
wet with rain
and fallen leaves
tears for no one
tears for everyone
this beauty this beauty this beauty that has no words
is a word
this love this love this love that has no words
is all words
taste touch sight sound
joy love sorrow
despair
every word is love touching itself
through your eyes
your heart
this heart that beats
one beat
one kiss
one breath
this very breath
breathing itself
is the song of love
can you hear it
in the fading of moonlight's gaze
into darkness
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